After my son finished his dinner, he realized that he forgot to sit next to me during dinner, then his mood drastically changed.
I tried to distract him by having him eat dessert next to me, but once we tried to get him up to bed, things started to escalate. He started hiding under furniture. I asked him what he was doing, he said, “I don’t know” in a very grumpy tone.
From there, things continued to escalate. It wasn’t long until he was screaming that he needed to hurt someone, then he started to kick me. He also ran to the kitchen drawer, but all he could find was a pie server to threaten me with. (All sharp stuff is locked up)
We then tried to encourage him to take a hot shower to help him calm down, but once upstairs he hit me with a toy, that’s where dad stepped in and took the role of keeping him in his room to keep the rest of us safe.
During this time my husband was beat up with flying objects and flying punches from my son. At one point, my son jumped onto my husband’s back, that isn’t easy being that he’s 6'3".
In the other room, his younger brothers were crying in their beds, scared from all the screaming and crashing noises they heard from the room next door. I stayed in the room with them to help them feel safe as we all cuddled under the blanket in one bed while I quietly read The Gingerbread man.
All I could think of was... to my little boys, is this experience any different than being raised in a home where a man is abusing his wife? What will this exposure do to them? Can I make them feel safe enough? My youngest is crying and my middle child has a tummy ache brought on from the anxiety he was feeling from his brother. My heart is breaking...
After it’s all over, my son finally takes that hot shower. Then when being put to bed he said he had a feeling like he needed to do something, but didn’t know what, that his feelings kept changing from happy, to sad, to angry. Then he drifted off to sleep.
We stayed upstairs until he was asleep to make sure everyone was safe. I never felt like I was unsafe, but I did recognize that if he was 16 instead of 10 years old, I would have been very scared.
Have you had these feelings? For those with older kids, do you ever feel unsafe during these rages?