Thursday, April 14, 2011

Speechless...

I took the kids to the park this week to enjoy some needed sunshine. Within minutes, a girl who was about 8 years old showed up. This was disappointing since the last two times we were at the park this same girl has made it a point to provoke my son with her deceitful tattling and smirks back to my son. So immediately, I told all my kids to stay clear, it was obvious that she was having fun pushing my son’s buttons, then telling on him.

After about 10 minutes of trying to get a rise out of my kids, she went to her mother to tell on my son, pointing him out as being the mean kid. Even though, I was carefully monitoring the situation, keeping my son away from her and trying to teach him how to cope with the situation, she still tattled.

As expected, all her taunting was increasing my son’s intensity. Every time she stuck her tongue out or gave the “slice your throat” signal to my son, I would hold him back. It felt like having an attack dog on a leash who was barking at the chance to attack.

About a minute later, it appeared they were leaving the park, whew! At that moment, another parent approached me and said that they too have had a problem with the same girl being mean to her kids. As I listened to their story, I glanced back over my shoulder to see my son, running full speed across the park to this girl and her family. Unfortunately, he was at quite a distance when I screamed out his name and saw him give a swift kick to the girl, right in front of her mother! I was too far away to hear what was said or see any reactions on their faces, but I was speechless.

He quickly retreated back towards me, falling to the ground about halfway back, exhausted from his quick sprint. The family, probably in shock, quickly left. I just shook my head, feeling once again defeated, completely mortified and embarrassed.

Why does this have to be so hard?

Why can’t we enjoy some damn sunshine!

I can’t even imagine what the parents behind me were thinking, let alone the mother who saw her own child kicked in front of her. My son was lucky she walked away, I don’t know that I would’ve been so kind.

As my son laid on the ground trying to catch his breath, my 8 year old fell to the ground sobbing because he was afraid my son was going to be arrested. Apparently, this girl told my kids earlier that her dad was a cop and that he could arrest them.

It’s always so easy to look back in hindsight and think... we should’ve left earlier, I should’ve talked to the other mother, I should’ve avoided the park altogether. These solutions would be so much easier if I wasn’t dealing with a handful of other kids. I had my two other boys and two children I was babysitting with me and they really needed some sunshine. I constantly feel torn between doing what’s best for my son and doing what’s best for the other kids. Sometimes, I’m able to walk the balancing act with everyone happy at the end of the day and other times I’m left... speechless.

9 comments:

  1. I am so sorry. I know as a parent we aren't allowed to say this, but here it goes...I'm glad he kicked her, she deserved it. Maybe in her big picture she'll walk away with the life lesson that sometimes people kick back so knock it off. Sorry, second Mama Bear venting! Be nice to yourself, forgive him and yourself (and the little girl too) and the sun will come out again tomorrow.

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  2. Amen RedBird!!! But Mama Bear ((((hugs)))) do be good to yourself.

    BTW, I have stopped by today to give you a blogger award! You can stop by here: http://www.lifestwistedstitches.com/2011/04/party-time-xs-two.html and read about it. Just copy and past and what-not. You truly deserve it love!

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  3. That is so funny, Redbird. I was thinking the same thing!

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  4. LOL! You crack me up Redbird! I imagine this girl will be more careful next time (if we meet again) either way, I’ll be more prepared.

    Thank you so much Mel! I’ll check it out. (((blushing)))

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  5. I too am sorry this happened. (and my son probably would've done the same thing--especially after hearing the other parents complain about her--he would think it was his duty to "take care of the situation") But it seems so unfair. What this girl was doing is inappropriate as well, but onlookers don't seem to see it that way.
    Kids like ours need (and deserve) to play at the park and be in the sunshine just as much as those other kids. It is just so unfair that the "solution" for us is often: avoid the park.
    I do hope what Redbird said is true and that this girl will learn something (and not just how to get sneaker at being mean...)

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  6. Yip - I know those feelings very well. My contrarian has 2 girls in his class who love provoking him. Last year not a week would go by without a phone call from the school. Then the school psychologist pointed out that the girls must also learn to not provoke because some people don't handle it well. It's a balance....

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  7. I was wondering, when kids pick on your child do you tell people that your child is easily provoked and has a hard time controlling their reactions? I always wonder if I should give some explanation to parents involved in these quarrels.

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  8. I have had so much issues at the park that I avoid it. We have a back yard. It's sad, but last time I went to the park I wanted to punch the mom who called my little autistic child the "r" word and threw her into a fit over something so small...we only wanted to get out of the house an hour. I had to go home. So I know what you mean.

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  9. Thanks for sharing Chasity, it’s nice to know I’m not alone.

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