Tuesday, March 6, 2012

2 Thumbs Up!

Things are going pretty good this week. Last week we were dealing with a lot of defiance, but this week it hasn’t been a problem. Once again, leaving me with the question, “Was he unstable last week or just pushing limits?” It seems the older he gets, the harder it is to tell since we’re now moving into more adolescent testing. When I’m in the moment I tend to think that he’s just pushing limits, laughing at me as he flat out defies me while trying to pick a fight with everyone. But when I think back, I recall the moment of sadness that preceded the defiance. Then when I consider this week and how he’s respectful and following directions with a great attitude and trying to be a good big brother, it makes me question how much was mood related and how much was just preteen behavior. I suppose it’s often a little of both.

On the upside, therapy is still continuing weekly and it’s been fantastic. Last week I was able to participate in a session and I was so impressed with how in tune the therapist was. She seemed to follow my son’s reactions like a choreographed dance, if he went one way, she gracefully followed. She had a gentle way of engaging him whenever he would shut down, it was pretty impressive to watch. Even though we covered some tough stuff during the session, she was able to put a smile on his face by the time we left. I’d have to give our therapist 2 thumbs up!

1 comment:

  1. Humm, about your son. I agree with you that it can be both.
    And it can also mean that he grows up and that you can reassess the rules to see if it's still adapted to your son at 11 yo.
    It can also mean that it's time to reassess the rules, to see what fits your son's current needs and what don't fit your son's current needs.
    There is nothing wrong to reassess from time to time what rules we can keep and what rules we can change.
    The same holds true when you have different sets of rules, one for the stability periods and one for the instability periods. It doesn't mean you "give up educating your son", it just means that you set realistic expectations : if your son were having ventricular tachycardia which prevents him to do sport, would you punish him for not making sport ? Of course not, because if this condition prevents him to do sport, it's absolutely unrealistic to expect so.
    Same for any illness in the world.

    Your son grows up, and some rules which were useful when he was very young may be outdated.
    You can also feel the need to add new rules because he has new activities or new needs that current rules don't preview.
    Again, there is nothing wrong about adjusting rules to your child's current needs. It is still being a parent, because everything changes with the time. So does rules can change with the time, and again, there is nothing wrong about it.